Positive Privilege?

So recently, I've been working on a wonderful, almost perfect relationship with a wonderful, pretty much perfect individual. That's why I haven't written in quite some time. But I was on facebook this morning and came across this article by Tim Wise, author of White Like Me:

http://ephphatha-poetry.blogspot.com/2010/04/imagine-if-tea-party-was-black-tim-wise.html#comment-form

I'm not sure how to repost stuff and make it legit so hopefully this qualifies.

When I read the article, I was thinking to myself, "Cool, this is typical Tim Wise. Great stuff." But then I got to the comments section and I began to feel a myriad of emotions, which is pretty typical of what comment sections do for me.

I expected idiots like Neil, plxrobert, tuffguy183, skinnies_eats, Atlanta, and Gabe to post something that completely misses the point. If I want more of that, I would just go to macon d's blog, stuff white people do.

What really got me thinking was the huge majority of responses that praised the crap out of Mr. Wise or simply said something along the lines of "Thank you, you're the shit!" And most of those commenters appeared to be white.

Here's my deal. People of Color (PoC) have been saying what Mr. Wise has been saying and seeing what Mr. Wise has been seeing for centuries. One commenter, Whitaker, even said "Progressive Black, White, Asian, and Latino Americans have been too silent." Excuse me?!? In the immortal rant of Dr. Cox, Wrong! (Watch it, it's my fav) Actually, oppressed people have been screaming and yelling since the beginning of oppression. Oppressors have the privilege of selective hearing. We (as in people fighting for equality in general) aren't silent, we're never silent. It's just that people like Whitaker don't listen. In many cases, they choose not to.

So my beef is that when a white person posts something anti-racist, the post gets 90 comments about how much God has blessed that white person. Now imagine if I posted something like that. Or if any other PoC posted something like that. If you aren't President Obama, you ain't getting 90 comments of praise. You're getting 100+ comments of ignorant diatribe that would deflate the mood of the most resilient activist. An article by a PoC would either be read five times so it can be picked apart for mistakes, or not even read at all. So what is it that grants white people inherent credibility in matters of race? Men in matters of gender? Heteros in matters of LGBT? (etc...) Why is it so hard for dominant identities (white, male, middle class, straight, Christian, etc...) to realize that the people who live as marginalized identities, who must confront that identity on a daily basis, have more experience in such matters? Doesn't that experience give PoC more credibility in matters of race? Women in the matter of gender? etc...


Privilege is ugly. Its pervasiveness is scary. I think the comment section on that post goes beyond each person displaying some form of white privilege, but the section itself was an entity of whiteness. How do we fight that sort of force?


Actually, maybe the real question is should we fight that? Is this a good thing? Since Mr. Wise has that privilege, should he use it for education and leadership? Is this a positive form of privilege? Is there such a thing?


Maybe I should rename the blog to "Questions of a 20-some year old multiracial kid"?

"What Nationality Are You?"

I don't care how colorblind you think you are, if you grew up in American society, a society of boxes, you see differences in skin and gender. In addition, I believe we all have assumptions based on someone's outward appearance that automatically register in our subconscious. When you see an Asian man, there are immediate responses and images in your head that you are aware of or not. A woman came to my place of work, a restaurant, and while I served her some soup she straight up asked me "What nationality are you?"

Now, if you are not multiracial or mixed or however you choose to identify, listen closely because the answer to this question is this:

It's none of your fucking business

The question "who are you" and its variations are a form of othering. Why? Because you don't run around asking everyone you meet this question, just the people who don't fit neatly into your race boxes. Most mixed race people experience a life time of this. In addition, there is lots of pressure to choose a racial identity from the outside. Although this may be the case for many mixed raced people, I interpret my experience a little differently. I feel like when I revealed that I was half-Japanese, people automatically registered that as exotic or unusual or foreign. When  I revealed my identity, I was no longer all of me, but "half" of me. People completely forgot about my white identity and automatically grilled me on what made me exotic and different. "COOL can you speak it? Will you speak some right now? What does this mean, "ching chong ching chong ching wing wang?" Have you heard this joke?"

Regardless, there are typically very painful experiences associated with the question "What are you?", and when this woman asked me what my nationality was at my work, all of these experiences flashed through my mind. Typically, I reply like a smart ass by answering the question in "the wrong way". Usually my answer to "What nationality are you?" is "Oh I'm American, specifically United States-ian" or something along those lines. Here's the kicker... In this particular situation, I straight up told the woman that I was Hapa, Half-Japanese and Half-White. Why? Because she appeared to be a woman of color. If she looked white, or if it was a white man, I would fight to keep my identity to myself.

So what is the difference between a white person asking and a person of color (PoC) asking?

The woman immediately identified herself as the same thing. There was an immediate connection between us that I rarely feel. The knowledge and experience, though unique, are the same. But it wasn't a verbal gushing between us. It was just a knowing smile. She appeared to be much older than me. I wanted to know if my experience differed from hers because she seemed to be from a different generation.

I later realized that this is probably a uniquely mixed race person experience.

Anyway, the difference between a white person and a PoC asking is simple to me. Generally, I think the intentions behind the question are very different depending on who is asking the question. White people are "curious" and want to figure out where I fit in their mental race boxes. PoC, particularly mixed folks, are interested on who I am and understand that my racial identity plays a big role in my life. The difference, as you can see, is the fact that I know that PoC are trying to get to know me, where as I feel like white people are just trying to "figure me out". Like it's a game. In addition, I have many negative experiences associated with white people asking "What are you?"

I hope one day I can feel like everyone's intention is to get to know me so I don't have to feel like I'm on my guard about my identity all the time.

What's in It for White People?

One of the most important questions for social justice advocates is "what's in it for White People"? Why would white people want to level the playing field? Why give up these privileges that this country worked centuries to give?

I have a very good friend, and for the sake of this post, I'm gonna name him Ecirb. He self identifies as a white heterosexual male who is in his upper 30's. How he grew up is very important to who he is and his current situation, but that doesn't matter in the context of this discussion because he looks like a white guy. He is an Ethnic Studies Major and I am proud to say that he is a social justice advocate, not that I'm the end all to determining who is and isn't an advocate.

Him and I talk about many things, but recently our discussion has been centered around the perception of white people in general social justice spaces. Just a warning, this is a very multi-layered, complex, and difficult situation to deconstruct, but I am going to try. In addition, I'm not saying that Ecirb's situation applies to all white hetero males in social justice but I think there are very important lessons to be drawn from his experience.

These are a small sampling of some of his experiences as best as I can recall them, and I will try to be as objective as possible since these are "facts" according to Ecrib. These experiences are very important in deconstructing the role of white hetero men in social justice:

• There is a lobby area for Ethnic Studies students that contains a couch and computers. It is a wonderful space to congregate and talk about social justice issues and class since it is a relatively small department. Ecirb tells me that when he is alone with one of his friends (in this case it happens to be a woman of color (WoC), she is open and very interested in what he has to say and very involved in the conversation. But when other's walk in, she becomes aloof, almost as if she doesn't know him.

• One time, he walked into the room with a friend of his who appears to be a black hetero male and there was the buzz of conversation. When he walks in, the room goes quiet and Ecrib's friend says "He's cool" and points to Ecrib.

• He feels ignored in class. Or most of his comments are met with resistance. Or people quickly dismiss his comment.

• He is very up-front with his opinions. If you are being a bigot, he will say it to your face because that's how he deals with it.

There is one thing that I make clear to him every time this conversation comes up. No matter WHO he is, the fact that he APPEARS to be a white male makes it very difficult to operate within a social justice environment. I constantly tell him that his phenotype conjures up for most people of color (PoC) an ENTIRE LIFETIME of negative experiences and that is something he cannot help and must overcome. I think he gets that, but it is also easy to forget such a privilege to be able to walk around and not have to worry about how your very physical appearance is enough to incite painful experiences.

The consequence of this is that he must prove himself. He has to work harder to be legit or make friends in this department. He has no issue with the fact that he has to work harder, and neither do I. This is the consequence of centuries of oppression: that excellent people such as Ecirb must work hard to become basic friends with excellent people such as the PoC in the Ethnic Studies Department. It becomes extremely problematic for me when some of the PoC and some white women (WW) DON'T GIVE HIM A CHANCE to prove himself. I understand that it's safer to assume the worst with white people. It's a safety mechanism. I do it too. But to shut out people like Ecirb and to suppress/ignore what he has to say is detrimental to everyone.

In fact, not giving Ecrib a chance GOES AGAINST WHAT WE'RE FIGHTING FOR. Ending the isms will take every individual, and it is counter-productive and ignorant to exclude anyone on the basis of what they look like. Take the hint people! He's majoring in Ethnic Studies in his late 30's. Maybe he knows more about bigotry then you do just from how much longer he's been alive? Maybe so, maybe not, but he said he was used to getting treated this way and it wasn't until recently that the full weight of what he's facing really hit him.

This is a very careful balance though. I took me a long time to realize that I HAVE to give white people a chance to prove themselves, but white people have to understand that it is an uphill battle to prove themselves. And just like some white people aren't worth talking to because they're SO STUPID AND RACIST, some PoC and WW are the same way. You do not have to prove yourself to these people because there is nothing you could say or do to change their mind.

One other criticism I have is that I don't feel like any PoC's have his back. Like there's a social consequence to defending a white guy. How about you defend your FRIEND??

I don't do this enough, but I need to remind Ecirb that he needs to stay humble. No one is asking him to lead us out to the promise land. In fact, he CAN'T be a predominant leader in a social justice movement because of his identity. This space is for PoC and to some small extent WW. He can support but he can't lead. That invokes the White Savior Complex. White male arrogance will get him thrown off the boat and ruin his credibility.

On the other hand, he needs to realize that the real work to be done isn't with a community of PoC, but his responsibility is in a community of white people in respect to race, men in respect to gender, and straight people in respect to sexual orientation. He has the advantage in those spaces. This is where his privilege of credibility can be used to his/our advantage. These are spaces where he can be a leader.

There is much work to be done in both groups. The social justice movement needs to get its shit together just as much as white people do. We all have room to learn and grow.

So what's in it for white people? I have my theories... But I want to hear yours.